G2W: 13 (Edit) Up

So I was supposed to do this like three weeks ago.  The truth is, I wasn't really into the photo.  And then life took over, and now I've missed three weeks of challenges.  Unfortunately, that's just how that had to be. 

And frankly, I hate my edit.  But that's the way it is with art making and learning, right?  Sometimes we make things that are awesome accidents that turn out beautifully simply because of the process of art making.  And sometimes, not so much.  I read recently that we are often afraid of trying new skills or incorporating new ways of doing things because for a period of time, we fall back.  It takes longer to do what we want to do, or the product is not as good.  But then we stick with it, and the new skill is incorporated.

Sometimes I get incredibly frustrated because that learning curve always seems steeper for me.  Other people seem to pick up skills fast, post amazing photos, start their photography businesses and show off their incredible skills.  I feel like I've been learning photography for years and years, and the science of it just does not click in my brain.  The more I think about it, the more I seem to mess it up.  That seems to be applicable to a lot of things for me, now that I think about it!  Maybe I just need to stop thinking so much, and enjoy the process a bit more.  If only it were that easy... 

Here is my edit.  I'll hopefully be able to pick up again soon.  I'm visualizing it like a game of double dutch - I'm just watching the rhythm until I'm ready to jump in again. 

ABAW:13

I've been doing a lot of thinking this week.  I'm falling behind in everything I am doing, drowning in a desperate pile of paperwork, staring woefully at my art projects across the room, and stacking up a list of to do items that is becoming laughable.  At this point, I'm just sitting back and twistedly watching to see how bad it can get.  Eh, what else can you do, huh?

I've been feeling trapped, obligated.  Obligated.  Observing that my needs aren't being met, and my roles are becoming confused.  I'm not growing, I'm learning but in fits and starts.  I am undervalued.  I help others do better than I have a hope of doing right now.  Things are twisted and backwards.

A big argument last night brought up hurtful, truthful observations.  I'm afraid of making a change.  I work too much.  I bring home too little money.  We are not making steps towards our goals, and I am not helping.  All the idealistic views in the world are not helping me take a real look at the reality of what I need to do. 

And so I need to set priorities:  unearth myself from the wastefulness of paper, begin applying for jobs and asking for what I am worth and do what needs to be done for my little family needs to grow.  Start a retirement fund.  Clean the damn apartment.  And somewhere in there, find a little place for art making - to not forget that I have needs that have to be met.

G2W: 13 (SOOC) Up

This is my "good" shot.

But this is the one I want to edit:

Scavenger Hunt

High Key: This is one of those cases when I realize I have no idea what I'm doing. I didn't know that high key was a photographic technique. I only thought about the key that is stored above our bedroom door, that unlocks the locks in our apartment. But - I *think* I did this correctly anyway.

Bedroom:  I actually took this a bit ago, and I wanted to share it.

Something tiny:  Shredding.  I was reaching this week.

Off in the distance:  Captured this rainbow while driving around this weekend.

Stripes:  I told you all I was reaching this week.  So unoriginal.  Sigh.

21: 3 Little Words

I just started 21 Secrets, an online series of workshops to provide new ideas for art journaling.  Yay!  For all of the classes, I am using an altered book.  I hopeful that I'll be able to look back and remember an exercise or technique and be able to use it as inspiration in the future. 

The book itself is providing me a little bit of frustration:  the book is titled Dracula.  Yes, Dracula.  So peep in the background of my journal pages to see little tidbits on the original (although no Edward) vampire.  I'd like to point out that the word mapping exercise is on top of a map of Transylvania!  Ha, love how those things work out. 

The first class I signed up for is called 3 Little Words.  Over the weekend, I've been playing with words, series of words, phrases, poems, and lots of paint.  And I realized that I forgot something:  I like to write poetry. 

A Year In The Life of an Art Journal 2/28 + 3/15, creativeTherapy 129

I've been steadily working on my art journaling, using prompts from A Year in the Life of An Art Journal and creative Therapy.  I'm also taking an online class, 21 Secrets, to learn twenty-one new ways to art journal.  My dining room table/art desk is a total mess!  Its awesome. 

A Year In The Life of An Art Journal

February 28th
THE PROMPT: I'm Beautiful
THE SONG: Real Love by Regina Spektor
PRODUCT/TECHNIQUE: Self-portrait

I should say first that I purposely edited out a personal photo.  I'm not quite ready to share images of myself or my husband (although I will share deeply personal art work!).  I took a long time to work on this one - I didn't know what I wanted to say, and I think I kept editing myself instead of just jumping in. 

I started by building up the background with paint, and then stamping the phrase "all i really was doing was waiting for you" from the song.  I was experimenting with using medium on photographs, and slathered two photos with a heavy medium and peeled off the backing.  It took forever, but looks really cool when done.  I used this technique on the two shadow images on the right.  More paint, words, writing. 

Ultimately, this journal page ended up stating that I always felt like I was waiting for my husband.  He makes me feel good, loved, beautiful even.



March 15th
THE PROMPT: Confidence Shot
THE SONG: Strut by Adam Lambert
PRODUCT/TECHNIQUE: eye shadow

Oh I love this one.  My art journal is an altered book:  on this page, there was a scene of a cobbled street that I didn't want to cover up, so when priming the page, I left it uncovered.  I searched for an image that portrayed "strut" and ended up choosing an image from a magazine with a woman running.  I smothered the image in heavy medium, removed its backing and was left with this glowing image.  I placed that over the street.  I played around with more paint, words, writing.  I added one line from "Strut":  let the freedom begin.  And the eye shadow - I actually used some to shade the edges of the pages. I have this great phrase from a magazine:  (IM)PERFECT - I added a quote to change it to (I'M)PERFECT. 

All together, I guess I am saying that running is my confidence shot.  It makes me feel like I'm going somewhere, it makes me feel strong, and it helps me get my thinking together, so I can move forward in my non-running life too.

creative Therapy: 129
What is a family keepsake you have or hope to have?

I had a hard time with this one too, layering on paint and then finally realizing what I wanted to say.  I initially thought I would want to be the keeper of the photographs.  But as I thought of it more, I realized I wanted really to be the carrier of the stories, the elder who passed down the legends of our family. 

I stamped "once upon a time", added transferred images that I applied matte medium to -- I chose an b&w image (it transferred so beautifully), an image of toys in front of books, a photograph book and a person.  I used this image of the person to link the whole page together, drawing these climbing vines all over to indicate the web of family, stories, histories.

G2W: 12 (Edits) Green

I chose this one to edit this week:

My edits: I did quick edits in Lightroom before exporting to Photoshop, where I ran Ashley's Nice and Easy action.  I audibly said "wow" after I ran it -- you could reach out and touch the stones on the wall.  And then I went a little fancy (for me) - I added a duplicate layer of the background, blurred the background and erased the foreground.  I decreased the exposure in the background, burned a little on the post, and did my favorite edge burn.  And somewhere in there, I played with the colors to up the green a bit.  I did all the fancy shrinking and unsharp masking and saving in flikr, and here you go! 

ABAW:12

I knew I would like this book when the character spent the first chapter talking about her school schedule:  If I were to make up a torture for someone, it would be you have to have gym right in the middle of your day.  Your body is not in the mood for gym in the middle of the day.  A quintessential thirteen year old, she speaks matter of factly, with quirky observations about her life.   I am smitten with her, I know I would enjoy just watching her talk, and that my eyes would twinkle when she was around.

I love the way the character speaks so much that I used her words for the first class in 21 Secrets, an online art journaling 'playground'.  Our task was to identify three word statements: little paper boats, all my life, a raggedy silence.  Next step is to make art with those phrases...

It all reminds me of being twelve, thirteen and playing with words, phrases, writing songs and poems.  My best friend and I would craft funky choruses and soulful bridges to terribly corny songs about love.  Love.  We had no idea.  We were just learning and trying to figure it out, make sense of it all. 

G2W: 12 (SOOC) Green

I think I could do a whole year of Green.  My favorite color, my whole life is filled with green.  Here are some from a photo adventure taken this weekend...

I will probably do my edit on this one, I think it has potential even if its over exposed.

Thoughts?  Secret code on suburban mailboxes?

I realized my camera was slightly overexposing shots.  So I intentionally underexposed this by one notch.

ABAW:11

I came home one night from work hurting.  Not so much a hard day, it was just a day, with all the typical hard things I have to do, hear and take in.

In one area of my life, I am working on being more open, in touch with my feelings.  As I left work, I remembered sitting in yoga last week, and hearing the teacher say that the area we worked on (hips, I think) could cause a flood of emotions to come to the surface.  I did good work during that class.  I left feeling fine, and although I have felt more vulnerable leaving other classes, I didn't this time.  I realized that it took a week before those feelings came to surface. 

And so I came home and blindly reached for a book to escape from the heaviness and intensity of my feelings.  This one fit just right, as if I was one of the characters doing exactly the same thing.  The book is smooth, descriptive, and luscious, and I slipped easily into the layers of stories, each with happy endings.

I think I need a lot more happy endings.